Woke up in a fog around 6:30 a.m. Jogged, showered, put on a $400 outfit. Ate a small healthy breakfast, drank a tremendous amount of coffee.
Someone in D.C. is trying to run with a dog. The person and the dog can not keep the same speed and they both give up.
If it is a day off go for a longer jog.
Everyone just complained about the weather.
D.C. does not work before 9:00 a.m.
There is always traffic between 7:00 and 10:00. When driving leave at least 45 minutes early.
At this moment, five different cars have cut five other cars off, all ten cars are honking.
When taking the Metro, prepare to be uncomfortably close to the people next to you.
On one metro train there is a family of tourists, five businessmen, seven businesswomen, an elderly woman hiding a cat in her purse, two Swedish students, at least one aspiring politician, eight interns, a reporter from the Washington Post, a reporter from Politico and a partridge in a f**king pear tree.
Women in sky-high heels and men in shiny wingtips begin to fill around the city with sound. The clacking of their expensive shoes is deafening.
The city is dressed in black, grey and cream colors except the fashionable coworkers that wore pastel colors every once and a while.
Every Starbucks is full now and every copy of the Washington Post is gone.
One customer orders a tall caramel iced coffee with room for cream and one other orders a tall skinny latte, a grande dark roast, a venti dark roast with half and half (if there isn’t half and half left whole milk is fine), a venti cappuccino, a trenta salted caramel hot chocolate (they don’t sell that in a trenta but if you ask nicely they might make it) and a venti iced-tea lemonade.
The second customer has gotten two of the six drink orders wrong.
A tourist sits down in front of Capitol Hill abruptly aware that there are cameras watching them him at all times.
Around the Capital things are calm and then they aren’t. The birds that sit in the seasonally dormant trees grow increasingly louder as a helicopter flies by. A couple police cars pass by and an ambulance is just a block behind. A flutter of journalists and interns has passed by. And then everything is silent again.
Someone just had the idea to protest at the Supreme Court this week and is wondering how they get a permit for that.
Everything has scaffolding on it, that has to be a metaphor for something.
The Museum of Natural History has at least 10 different schools having tours around the same time.
Someone thought they saw Obama walking by a window at the White House. That person told all their friends about this later.
The National Gallery of Art is featuring Marc Chagall but people are sticking around the Van Goghs instead.
Someone has just gotten lost around Dupont circle while simultaneously another person has just discovered that the east to west streets are lettered, the north to south streets are numbered and the diagonal streets are states.
Four people are late for a meeting because a motorcade passed by.
At the Air and Space Museum a kid just lost his damn mind.
An older woman fell asleep at the United States Botanic Garden in the jungle section. It is very warm there, it’s completely understandable. No one has woken her up yet.
There is a long line at Georgetown Cupcake.
Twelve people are looking for a parking place, 100 percent of them are going to end up parking two blocks away.
Ten other schools just headed towards the Lincoln Memorial.
The other memorials are getting jealous.
Maybe Lincoln wants some time to himself.
The Kennedy Center is filling up for a new show.
An older man with a camo jacket and a short grey beard is crying at the Vietnam Memorial. He is touching one name towards the end of the wall. He thinks it should have been his name.
The Cherry Blossoms are just about the bloom, everyone says so.
It’s 5:00 p.m. and there is a new round of traffic.
A transplant just finished moving into a closet of an apartment for $1,000 a month.
If people are home they have finished dinner and are starting on Fox News or the Daily Show. Or they might settle with CNN.
It’s time for the last class at Georgetown.
It’s 10:00 p.m. and alcohol was no longer being sold.
If people are out maybe they are at a bar with friends
Maybe they are out at Poets and Prose.
Maybe a rich friend was holding a dinner party in a brownstone.
Maybe they wandered into the wrong quadrant and are now desperately lost.
Maybe they are at a political or NGO gala.
Someone was just forced to take a cab home.